Silence is Golden<\/p>\n
Copyright 2007 by Shea Oakley<\/p>\n
All rights reserved<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
“Tis better to remain silent and appear a fool, than to speak and remove<\/p>\n
all doubt.” \u2013Unknown<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
We are told in several places in the Old and New Testaments that<\/p>\n
remaining quiet is often the better alternative to speaking. The wise<\/p>\n
are often portrayed as persons of few words and fools as those who do<\/p>\n
not know when to stop talking. Despite the apparent clarity of<\/p>\n
Scriptural teaching on the need to listen more than speak, we denizens<\/p>\n
of the Twenty-First Century Church do not seem to get it. In our<\/p>\n
media-saturated “talking-head” society every one seems to want to<\/p>\n
make themselves be heard as often as possible. Perhaps it is connected<\/p>\n
with the “15 minutes of fame” idea. The more we talk the more chance<\/p>\n
we have to get our egos gratified in the public square. As in so very<\/p>\n
many other of today\u2019s crumbling personal disciplines Christians are<\/p>\n
often indistinguishable from their secular counterparts when it comes<\/p>\n
to using their mouth more than their ears. (Before I come across as<\/p>\n
insufferably judgmental let me state for the record that the author is<\/p>\n
terrible at keeping his mouth shut. I have somewhat improved in this<\/p>\n
area in recent years, but the fact remains that I love to hear the sound<\/p>\n
of my own voice. Call it “Vocal Narcissism”).<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
As the old folk proverb says, “we have two ears and only one mouth, so<\/p>\n
we should listen twice as much as we speak”. It is probably safe to say<\/p>\n
that the proportion suggested here has been pretty effectively reversed<\/p>\n
in contemporary culture. In fact the two to one speaking\/listening<\/p>\n
ratio is probably too conservative to describe many of us.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Beyond that it sometimes seems as if the person who actually does<\/p>\n
hold their tongue for a time during polite conversation is not doing it<\/p>\n
to listen so much as to think about what they are going to say next.<\/p>\n
Truly attentive listening is a lost art. This is spiritually dangerous for<\/p>\n
two reasons. The first is the aforementioned narcissism, also known as<\/p>\n
ungodly self-centeredness. The second is the fact that children of God<\/p>\n
are supposed to hang on every word that comes from His mouth in<\/p>\n
order to live a life pleasing to Him. This is hard to do when we will not<\/p>\n
let Him get a word in edgewise!<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Prayer, for instance, was always intended by God to be two-way<\/p>\n
communication. Our relationship with our Lord will be stunted if we<\/p>\n
speak our prayers without ever pausing to hear His reply. It is only in<\/p>\n
the quiet which comes when we finally learn to shut-up that we begin<\/p>\n
to hear that “still, small voice\u2019 the Bible tells us is often God\u2019s preferred<\/p>\n
means of contact with us. God will not shout to be heard over our<\/p>\n
verbal torrents and until we come to grips with that fact we will miss<\/p>\n
out on hearing from the One Person it is most needful for us to listen<\/p>\n
to.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I do not have any easy answer for this trend towards Christian<\/p>\n
verbosity. It is tempting to suggest that we need to take a page from<\/p>\n
the Desert Fathers of the early church and go to some remote place for<\/p>\n
a good long while where we could be by ourselves. With no audience<\/p>\n
within 25 miles maybe we would lean to appreciate the quiet and make<\/p>\n
it our own habit to be quiet ourselves. But the world we live in today<\/p>\n
does not make that particularly easy to do. The vast majority of us<\/p>\n
cannot take a three-month sabbatical from human company. We have<\/p>\n
to find another way.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Perhaps the answer is to carve out shorter times of solitude each day as<\/p>\n
a way to practice quietness. Or we might do the unthinkable and<\/p>\n
actually ask our friends and family whether we talk too much and too<\/p>\n
foolishly. If they are honest with us we might just be shocked enough<\/p>\n
by their answer to consider the wisdom of silence. The revelation that<\/p>\n
our feet are regularly spending time in our mouths may actually be<\/p>\n
enough to make us keep those mouths safely closed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Silence is Golden Copyright 2007 by Shea Oakley All rights reserved “Tis better to remain silent and appear a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.” \u2013Unknown We are told in several places in the Old and New Testaments that remaining quiet is often the better alternative to speaking. The wise are… <\/p>\n